The Next Big Thing
LimBei is my nick
KLKX is my name
design'by- *blackraeyn;
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
Sunday
Did nothing except watch FMA. The best anime ever... Lost my voice, dunno why also. Maybe is acculmalation of phlegm.
Monday
Wake up at 8am. Went to KSS around 9.45. Went SJ room, wrote down some instructions for the log dept then went down to take a look at the KSS idol audition. Aisyah was singing Tong Hua with two of her friends. Did not go stand infront and see, to reduce stress level for her.. Haha.. Stand at the back of the staircase to listen. Heard comments like "She is not chinese". True.. Malay girl sing chinese songs.. The pronounciation was fine but of course dont sound that chinese la. I think their grp cannot be together. In the sense that their voices dont go together. So the end result is not so music to the ear. This reminds me of the time that i was in KSS. Me, ong and wei jian formed a grp and took part in a singing competition in 03. Our grp name was SKB.. Steven Kenneth Brian.. But i always call it Sucker Kenneth Bastard.. Haha.. So i was the only normal one in the grp. Which later on my auntie interpret it as Su ku Boys.. Haha.. That time ong and wei jian was very on with break dance and supporting Energy. So ong choose their song Duo Ai Wo Yi Tian. Actually, i dont even know such a song existed until i see that mv. So that shows how "popular" that song was. We practice singing in SJ room sometimes. Then practice our steps also.. Then i made "mic" for everyone of us. The "mic" is actually my sec 3 DT project la.. I dismatle it then each of us take one piece of it. Then we sign our name on it.. The audition that time was at the hall. Cant remember who were the judges. But i remember like got alot of ppl watching. I was the backup singer which means the one with lesser exposure time. In the end, we didnt make it.. Haha.. But it was still an experience. At least i did not waste my time in KSS and have tons of fond memories there.
After aisyah audition, went home. Look around for my volleyball, then found that is was soft le. Then went over borrow pump from jerilyn mother. Tried to pump it but cannot find the hole. So gave up, return the pump and took back the books i lend jerilyn 2 yrs ago. Haha.. Then went lot 1 see got any volleyball anot. Last time i saw got one volleyball only $18 at sentosa. So trying my luck to see if can get any around that price. Went world of sports first, saw the Mizuno $49.90. Damn exp lor.. Even more exp then the one i already had. Of course la, Mizuno stuff is damn exp one. Then went over royal sporting house. Saw one $21.90. original price $35.90. Brand - Wilson. Never know that they produce volleyball too.. I always thought they produce rackets only. So bought it lor. Was suppose to meet rosnah at the mrt station at 12.15. Then sat there till 1220 then msg her. Few minutes later, she replied say she going later. WT... This kind of situation, it is basic manners/rights to msg the person you are meeting that you will not be meeting him/her right.. Damn.. Made me waited for nothing. Then nvm.. Was suppose to meet syakir at jurong east at 12.35. Then he msg say he will be late. Then i wait for him till 12.45 then he call me. Say that his gf's friend will be late, so ask me wait at eunos first. Then i went off first lor. Reach eunos at 1320. Sat there for damn long. They reach at 1405. So sianz of waiting for ppl le.. Then did some mini intro, then went to take bus. Took 15 and alighted at parkway parade. Meet faz and his gf/ex nursing student jessea. Walk to ECP. Saw qion wen, yi ying and the girls. Put down bags then qionwen say need to buy things, then she listed down then me,sya,faz and gf walk back to the NTUC to buy. Bought quite alot of stuff. 4 bottle sprite, 2 bottle guava syrup,fire starter, 2 pack charcoal and 12 bottle of 1.5 mineral water. Wanted to buy chicken fillet too but they dont sell. Paid then wanted to walk back. Then one of the NTUC staff lend us a trolley. So nice of him. But he kana scolded from his supervisor. Haha.. We were playing with the trolley all the way. In the underpass, there are humps to stop cyclist from cycling. Then me and syakir was pushing the trolley fast and ram it against the humps to make the trolley "jump". Quite fun. Then we push the trolley on grass and sand and got stucked few times. 
When we got back, the girls were trying to start a fire. I decided not to help them even though i frequently do it in BBQs. My theory was to let them learn by themselves. Actually i was laughing internally when i see them start the fire. The pit so big then they only use two palm size of charcoal to start fire. Haha.. one look can see.. Noobs.. :P Of course i heard sarcasm coming from them la. Like "Dont know say dont know, dont act you know". bla bla bla~~ I was throwing a challenge to them, to set up the pit in 30min. Of course nobody listen la.. Haha.. FINALLY they manage to get the fire burning. I also did not take part in BBQing the food as i usually does. Leave it to them to do le.. And of course, i hear even more SARCASM. Actually sometimes i find it very funny, last time when i bbq the food, i will hear ppl complaining like "faster, very hungry". When someone is being nice to help everyone to bbq the food, and other ppl somehow complain about you, what would you feel. Then this time when i decided not to do anything, ppl also not happy. Complain that i was "USELESS"(YES! THAT WAS THE WORD I HEARD), come bbq makan then dont do anything. For God/Satan/Jesus or whoever or whatever shit you believe sake's, i am definitely a DAMN USEFUL person when i comes to minor things like BBQ. That's the Bottomline! Holy shit!
The above are not so happy stuff.
Played volleyball with wanyi, yuenshuan, meiting, pamela and guo hao. Not really play la.. Only hit a few time then never play le.. So actually brought the ball for nothing la. How i wish someday got ppl play volleyball with me.. Haha.. Then i brought out spammer. Busy taking photos. Took quite alot of photos. Took with jessica, meiting. Then still got grp photo. We guys were enjoying ourselves making poses. Haha.. Touch here touch there. Hug here hug there. So fun.. And one more not so happy thing. Syakir and girl went off early. They went off at around 6. I think the gf was not sporty la. So spoilsport/wet blanket lor.. And it was suppose to be a class outing, and he had to leave early because his gf who was not part of the class, not feeling comfortable with us. Damn it man! Hate spoilers! 
I think whole night i was busy taking pics, talking around. Did not eat alot. Prefer taking more pics. Then we also celebrated qion wen birdday. 21st bird day. Then guo hao slam a piece of cake at her face. Haha.. Then she was chasing him around like kids playing catching. Fun.. Another game we played was pepsi cola 1,2,3. Sounds childish but still as fun as before. Kana owned.. Hehe.. The girls were attacking me and guo hao, so we kana gangbang. We also played water war where there will be two teams, kicking water at each other. The team who is the wettest lose. Haha.. Another childish game but memorable.. Me team with guo hao and liwen vs joycelyn, sarah and jieying. Starting was losing, because the water kana the eyes, very salty. Later part of the game i was owning them. i repeat, "I" was owning them. My kick was much stronger than them. So the 3 of them were thoroughly wet. Then my the other two team mates were saying they got help also. Haha.. My foot la.. :P i think they were standing behind backstabbing me more than wetting them. Overall, it was a very fun day minus all those not so happy stuff that happened earlier.
Went over to sarah house via her father car with chee yan and jessica. Showered at her house and cut away my blister. The skin was torn then got sand accuamalated inside. Then we played mahjong. We play only one round and it lasted for 4 hrs. zZzzZzz! Damn long game. After that we watch show. Watch "The Big Fat Liar" then watch "Anastasia". I think jessica and cy was sleeping for both shows. Haha.. I watch abit then sleep abit then watch abit again. Anyway, any one heard of a dog who is gay? Haha.. One of sarah dog aka roughskin is gay. She was saying that when ppl use the toilet, the dog would look at guys and dont look at the girls. Then when i was using the toilet, it was hugging on to my legs. And it was shaking its lower part of the body. WT.. Lucky nothing happened.
Tuesday
Reach home at around 9.30am. Slept at around 9.45. Slept so long, till about 4.45pm then wake up. Wasted half day sia.. Then watch FMA. And my voice is still not back yet. Then my father ask me call mac because my mother never takeaway today. Then i was like staring at him because i cant really talk properly now and he want me to order. Then after awhile i ask him to order. Makan then began settling this sat training stuff. Just realise that mac was the official first meal of the day. Haha.. One meal only.. Hope my throat can clear asap. Hate that i cant talk properly now. *ahem**ahem*. And going out with li chween this fri. Take my 3 months expired bird day present from her. Haha..
Nitez to you~
ps. I love the photos.
and so He speaks
Sunday, February 26, 2006
What i can learn/see from this incident.. 1.Commoner and a first aider. Those who offered help were mostly commoner. Dunno what they were doing lor. All wrong technique. I dont like ppl who dont know anything act as if they know everything and cause disruptions here and there. If you dont know anything, jolly well STFU and get lost one side and DND. Shit to all those commoners. 2. Flight or fight. I understand more of this theory. Nobody wants to have extra troubles/problems for themselves. However, there will be time when situation arise that one has to undertake. When i went over, my heart was thinking "not my problem why help" and "let's go". But as i near the place, the fight became more obvious. If i dont do anything, he may die there in the presence of so many first aiders trained in CPR theory and some practical. Which will be a disgrace to the sch and to SJ. 3. I need to calm myself even more in times of needs. Because panic wont help, it will just make matters worse. 4. Dont take first aid so lightly anymore. It is not just small wounds, life and death may als0 be implicated like just now. During case study, i have been quite relax with it. From today onwards, i shall take a more serious attitude towards case study. 5. Doing a case study and doing a real case is definitely diff. You dont have a judge to tell you what sign and symptom of where he is injured. It is really by your own. If you miss out something, the person's life may be in danger. eg. I starts to see the casualty feet and hand turn cyanosis. Which in case study, the judge will just tell you and you dont have to even see it. 6. A more reliable or uniform standard must be set. Which in this incident, the way they called for help and equipment was like so vague. I only heard fainted. I think i will need to have a code blue system as use in hospital in case any incidents like this happen. This protocol must be follow strictly as to how the person is gonna pass the case and request for equipment and ppl. 7. The title "Qualified First Aider" seems a heavier responsibility and more significant now then before. One must be equiped in up to date skills and knowledge to call themselves a first aider. A basic first aid cert doesnt constitute a Qualified First Aider. Only an Adult First Aid cert holder can be called a qualified first aider.
Went home told my parents, then mother say good. Did a good deed today. They werent suprise at all. Or maybe they dont know what CPR is la. So just forget it la. Had soccer in KSS today. Found out that my right ankle is spoilt. I mean spoilt. I think the muscle have weakend due to frequent spraining of it. When i was "kia-o ka" wearing my shoe, the right side of the feet was flimsy. I think i have really detroyed my own ankle. And it is gonna last for a lifetime. And it will be my weak point now. I think a sweep on that ankle will probably throw me on the ground already. Haiz~ What luck!
Last, I am not a hero. I am just a nobody.
Nitez to you~
ps. Some motivations are back.
and so He speaks
Thursday, February 23, 2006
History - Join badminton club pri 3 and 4. Quit and join brass band. In it for around 1 yr. Then quit and join volleyball. Actually i dunno why i join volleyball also. I think is because my best friend at that time was inside. So played volleyball for two yrs. Started as a slacker, skipping trainings.. Then from dunno when suddenly became so enthu about it. I think is because of the bond with the team. When you have a relation/bond with a team or someone, it is hard to break them up. For team, train hard together, have own trainings etc makes you a stronger team.. Those were such fun days.. Had a competition in 1999, me pri 6 time. We got first in the district. Bukit timah district. That was the only competition we had and we got first. I still remember my jersey. The number 12 jersey. I still keep it in my wardrobe. Sometimes will take out and see. The trophy is happily standing in my cupboard with my line dance bronze and silver medals. Yes.. i said line dance. I passed the bronze and silver test from the N.A.T.D. Some international line dance organisation to certify ppl. I learn line dance in sec 1 or 2 due to influence from my 3rd aunt. She got her gold cross.(Bronze, silver, gold, gold cross, instructor) Dunno she got go for instructor anot. I had two public performance before too. Once when SBS introduce a new bus service to CCK interchange, the second at CCK park got some family events. Stop going for the lesson in 02 i think. Because no time to go le. I should have one more trophy but i keep it in KSS. Outstanding Trainee Award for Advanced NCO camp 02. Not much trophy or medal at home la. Only these few.
Continue. So sat at the bench watch lor.. My best serve is the side serve. I can score quite alot of points using that serve. Because it is fast and just over the net, so it is quite hard to catch it during my time. Maybe for my class outing i should bring my volleyball along and play with my classmates. If they know how to play. Or else, it would be left there and rot. Went home after two match. Bathe, chat on MSN. Then i found the Atlanta 1996 Olympics where Kurt Angle got his Olympic gold for men 100kg wrestling. Wasnt a nice win la. It was through referee decision. I thought he so power. After the video, i change my thoughts. Then watch the Brock Lesnar training video. That i admit is really POWER. That is why he is my idol. There is always a person someone idolise. Like my father, he really loves our minister mentor. He respect him alot. Whenever got news about him, he will switch channel and see. I think my mother's idol is Deng Li Jun. She always talk about how good she sings, her voice is incomparable etc..
Nothing much le.. Slp time..
Nitez to you~
and so He speaks
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Signs of aging
1. Crave for coffee and tea instead of cold drinks
2. Have aches on your bad ankle everytime you wake up
3. Feel tired even after long hours of rest
4. Room getting messier by the day
Wow!! i have all this.. Haha.. i am old.. No worries for teh bing addicts(Chrissy Missy and Poh jing Chi aka PJC). This are the signs of aging. Old old old!!
Just a thought.. The person you like will not be the person who likes you. The person who likes you will not be the person you like. True?? For now my answer is yes.
Big newss...... XLX blog is history. I believe is due to the NYP sex scandal thing. Well.. From this incident, it shows three things. The power of a blog,the quality of news report in sg and maybe abit of the education system. A blog is so personal yet so publicized. I believe the original idea of having a blog was not to create hell/chaos in the world. It is to let ppl who dont express their thoughts or feelings outwardly into words. And not to let everyone discuss about it. For eg. XX and XLX blogs.
This incident also show how "competent" sg reporters are. They can bring rumours from some God forsaken who-know-where place and put it into the papers where millions of ppl are reading. Ppl read papers to get the latest and most accurate news that can be found and written before the time it starts to be printed out. Who wants to read a papers filled with rubbish and false info. Nobody... This have caused a new low in reporting history. Ppl will have second thoughts of buying a paper and reading it the next time they see one. I believe the mass media need to find a good reason(or maybe excuse) and apologise to the public for their wrong info and the professionalism of their reporters.
It also shows a little loophole in the education system. Even before that student video came out, there was already a video of a lecturer and her student. Get it? How can you expect the lower ppl(students) to be good ppl when the top ppl(lecturers etc..) are doing things that is not right in the eye of the society? Is it this the world we want? Is this the education system that we want? It doesnt only apply to education. it applies to everything, every organisation, every group. What is education worth? "Nothing!" "Everything!"
These are only some of the problems that i listed out. There is definitely more loophole/problem than these few that we can learn from this incident.
Latest news from my class. The ass screwed guo hao in lecture again. GH was turning round to pass some money to pam, then that ass take it that he is talking in class. Then he made a comment saying that he dont like ppl talking in his class, if they want talk, he will chase them out. See.. This is the kind of lecturer that NYP can hire. Bringing its notorious reputation even more stinky now. We can actually complain about the lecturer and kick his ass out of our module. In poly we can request for a change of class, so a change of lecturer so be a no problem thing. Reason simply being that the lecturer find some students pain in the ass and hope to get rid of them through childish/stupid/moronic ways that he deem MATURE and JUST! Dont mess with poly students..
When someone offer a helping hand or a listening ear, should one accept it? Is it that hard to accept help even when the other party have no ill intentions? Must the other party prove his good intentions before the problem person can share his/her worries? Well~ For everyone to think about. My stand - It is hard to accept help if you have a big ego. Good or bad intentions must be judged by self. But i believe that it is hard to judge. By the time one makes the right judgement, the other party would have lose faith in him/her. For this time, i want to persevere. I miss out on too many things liao. I cant bear to see things slip away from me AGAIN! Tiring and frustrating but must carry on. Late le.. Slp time..
Nitez to you~
ps. Ever wondered who is the you in the nitez..
and so He speaks
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
Sch at 8am. Then 9 went for grp meeting for wed Dengue Fever presentation. Discuss awhile then finish. The class today should end at 11am. But the girls decided to go K box after i suggested to them. Then we skip 10am lecture go AMK K box. I guess everyone was off form la. Jessica sang Shan Hu Hai with me, but we cannot get together. Haha.. Chee yan and her hum ga ling. Sarah and her wilber(yucks!!). Forgot what jieying sang also. Haha.. Overall not that good. After that we went arcade at Jubilee. Play daytona, bishi bashi, taigu. Daytona first match i use manual play beginner. First time playing with manual. Got 3/5. Haha.. Fastest lap 16"23. Very good la since i first time using manual. I thought manual easy. Everytime see ong, bra, wei jian they all play like damn easy. When turning just change gear 1 then gear 3 then to gear 4 again. But is quite hard la. Second match we play advance then i use auto. Got first la even though never completed the race. Then after that play bishi bashi. Suck at a few of the games but pro at most. Haha.. Then i played taigu with sarah. Actually dont wanna play with her, because level different then hard lor. Then still play with her la. but is i choose songs. First song is the mozart song. Sarah still can make it. Then she say dont choose easy songs. Good lor like that. Second is the race horse that song. She whack until want die liao. Wahaha.. Then last song. The hardest song that i have played before. She said ok. Then i see she whack until damn tired and confused. Then by the end of the game, she complain that her arm was feeling funny. The usual tightness from playing it. But the stick not good. Too slippery and thick. Then play liao go home lor. Saw beatrice and sokting at lot 1. Follow them around go more than words buy present for their classmate i think. Then went home with beatrice. Discuss with her who is prettier in the corp. Haha.. A rather boring topic but still nice. She say christine nicer in sec 3. Sec 2 is mint. When we talk about sec 4, she said *&%##^%*#&. hehe.. Then i combine sec 3 and 4 then she gave same reply. Wahaha.. That part is censored. For more info pls ask her. =p Then i ask her if she think she pretty then she say no. Hmm~ No confidence in herself again.. Must have more ar... Saw kahmun on bus too. After i alight then walk home with her.. Staying same block. Then talk abit then reach home le.
Meet my mother at lot 1 with my auntie for dinner. The lot 1 coffee still the best. Bought food for my father. While waiting for bus, saw my primary sch friend. Achee. He was sending his gf home. Gf also from sj and study nursing at ITE. Saw geraldine also. Alighted then walk home together. Again!! Haha.. Same block also. One day met so many ppl. What a coincidence! Then do my mosquito model. Damn tired liao.. And damn angry too. I was so angry that i was perspiring like siao. Dunno for what also la. But just think that the person provoked me unknowingly. Went for a walk in the park. Walk to wei jian house that park sit awhile then walk back home.
Someone msg me today. Msg wrongly. But i found out something. The first msg in the morning goes like this.
"No la. I dont want to be so selfish la. Definitely no doubt i like him, but i dont want him to suffer any further. So i let go lor. maybe he will find something better than me. not worth it la"
Then second one in the afternoon.
"U crazy ar. Ask me to tell him. He sure shocked de lor. Maybe you are right. I shouldnt ask him out. Then maybe i will think of the past and not feel so confused now."
What to say.. What i can say is the "him" is refering to me. Dont ask me why I know about it. It is another small story years ago. Sometimes when you msg,u will be thinking of the person mention in the msg so you will forget who you are gonna send to. So sometimes will send wrongly. In this scenario, i got two choice. Reply her then start a relation with her, or act stupid like never receive any msg. Cliff on MSN say, " go be with her la. feelings can cultivate later" Does that sounds very bastard? I think so. Like cheating someone feelings. Saw her on MSN at night, she ask if i got receive any msg from her. Then i say got. Then she ask why never tell her. Then i crap about it here and there la. Then she say dont tell anyone. And she also never say who the him was. So i assume that she assume that i dunno that the person is me. Well~ At least i never listen to cliff advice this time. Or else i will live to regret it. Sometimes i hate to be clever. She is not the rib i am looking for. Dont bother asking me who she is. I will never say.
Today
Sch at 10am. Went at 9 to finalise the psycho presentation today. Get all the unfinished stuff done then roleplay. Presented at 12. Overall i think was average for my grp. Even though the other groups say it is above average, i still think can do MUCH MUCH better. Then after my grp is qion wen grp. Their presentation was very informatic. But they fail to link part 3 to psychosocial aspect of it. Or else i would have given a 5/5 for that part. In the end only gave 3. Because without the link it became less significant and answer less to that question. What a pity. That was what the lecturer said also. After that go makan then go eplaza. Went lab at 3. Boring lab. Learn infant restraint. Not impt topic. Then 4 went for bio tutorial. Kana screwed by the lecturer. He ask me explain how the sensory and motor neuron things, then what reflex arc. Which i totally dont understand. WTH lor.. Then after the tutorial he told guo hao that me and gh go sit in the front of the lecture at 5pm. Which i did not agreed la. Since he only told gh, then i heck care. Then in lecture. I sit at normal sitting place. Then he was staring at us. Then he came up and ask us go sit infront. Then i politely say thank you dont want. Then he said, "Either you go infront or get out of my lecture" then he walk off. WTFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!! This kind of lecturer also have.. *clap* Hail to NYP! The name of NYP is already very bad even before the sex scandal came out. Now got this lecturer ask student to get out. See how well my $6000++ is spent in such a "magnificent" sch. Rearing all this "great" lecturers to screw students. 可笑! A tertiary instituition got this kind of things happening. A crumbling education system. Sg no more.
I just sat there never move. Then gh was saying how ar, go out lor. Then i said "He is only a lecturer". True right.. He is only a lecturer and nothing else. He dont have the right to send students out. He think we still pri sch, anyhow anyhow kick students out of class. I PAY MY SCH FEES. I no longer pay $50++ every three months to let teacher screw me in sch like sec and pri sch. I am paying $2000++ every year to get this shit diploma. To be very frank. We are now in a service industry scenario. I pay you to teach me and not screw me upside down. The customer is always right. So STFU and F**K OFF. When i was tying my shoelace in class, he suddenly stop and stare at me. WTF he trying to do again. Damn it! I know he is trying to ask me to study. But the way he use is wrong. And my way of study is diff from his point of view. He is trying to ask me to concentrate in lecture so i wont be confused. His lectures are damn monotonous and at times sarcastic. So listening can be = not listening. My way of studying is want to study, i better study everything at the same time. I dont like to revise and revise for dunno what shit. I prefer chionging at the last few weeks. More stress but more adrenaline rush more excitement. And did i mention before that i never study for my prelims for O level just to find out how well or bad i can score without studying. Score a 41. At least i know where my standard is without studying. That is the crazy/style things that i can do. Anway, I cannot be tamed so easily. Not even my mother can tame me and he a mere lecturer wants to do it. Dream on till the day God send you to hell and say "Screw you, go and die". After the lecture, i went outside. I punched the door open. Punched the metal door open. It was so loud that everyone outside was looking and i think that thing also heard it. Who cares!! That is only a little of what i am able to do to anyone or things that get in my way. And to make it sounds nice, Let the hand do the talking!
Ate dinner at home. Eat ham with bread. On MSN, discuss the scandal with some ppl. Nothing much liao. Abit happier tonight. late le.. Slp time.
Nitez to you~
ps. I am no pushover. Not a guy to be reckon with. Bear the consequences!
and so He speaks
Sunday, February 19, 2006
Reach home started to do the mosquito model. Actually wanted to use 1.5litre bottle to make the body, but like no nice. Then my mother suggested using cloth and newspaper.. Thanks to my mother, we managed to get the body and head of the mosquito done. So now is lacking the legs and wings. The legs all cut out liao, just need to paint. wings use vanguard lor. Anyway, i have NEVER pass my art before.
Now uploading pics to friendster. Saw one video on youtube about judo. That guy performed a flying juji in a competition. Damn power lor. Nicer than the one I did during my performance. That guy grab the opponent's arm then jump up. He landed on the ground first with his legs entangling the opponents head and arm. Then the opponent fell to the ground because of the strain in his arm. The opponent slap the mat so many times. Haha..
Sharing session. Today my younger cousin got a slight fever. Then my uncle go take her temperature. It was 37.3. Then my uncle said, " No fever la". WTH!! Her limbs so warm and he say no fever. Walau.. Layman is really layman.. I did not bother to explain to them, i just made a comment that she is having fever then kept quiet, Sianz lor~ This goes to show that knowing knowing the optimum range of vital signs are important even to layman. Late le.. Sleep time..
Nitez to you~
and so He speaks
Went sch at 10am for clinical lab. Then makan at SC. 1pm meet at LtK for leadership meeting. Actually meet for nothing la. Because everything done liao, meet for the sake of meeting. Typical nursing students.. Then went to lecture room at 2. Found out that the lesson starts at 3pm. Went eplaza surf net awhile then go back for lesson. We were the last grp to present that day. First grp talk about collin powell. Second about florence nightingale. Third about hitler. Then my grp talk about salahudin. First grp damn boring, too much info liao. Second is ok. Third have bad colour combination. imagine a bright purple background for powerpoint presentation. So glaring. And Hitler is not officially a leader as he is considered a dictator. Heard that once in sg got some competition talk about leader, then they talk about hitler as a leader. I think ppl were not happy and the government have to handle that case. That is the impact Hitler have made. Haha.. The lecture room com sucks.. Cant play DVD. We wanted to show two scene from Kingdom of Heaven, then cant read. So we just skip that watching part. Then I described how the scene looks like and how it showed leadership qualities. Overall i think my grp presentation is average but creative. Because we thought of using a movie to aid in our presentation. Then nothing special happened.
Saturday
Which is today or yesterday la.. Went KSS for training at 8. Define some terms with the teams. Then ah leow thought CPR procedure. Choon siong was in sch today too. With his new "hairdo". Hehe.. Then at 9 we split the girls into two, one do CPR, one do FAC procedure with me. Just go through how a first aid case will look like. Primary survey. Then 10-11 is orienteering theory from NCC. Yisheng went through map reading then divide the corp into details. Then settled. Then went makan at limbang. Eat that damn exp cai fan.. That auntie so bad lor. So little stuff count $3. Shit lor. My sch Food junction even cheaper. Damn! Then went NTUC buy green tea share. Bus came at 12pm. Went CDANS for archery. Got to shoot alot today. Because today is mostly practical except the part where the instructor taught us how to grp the shots and to adjust our shots. It works. Then got competition. First simulation round i got 54. Then start real thing. First round got 57/60 with an X. Second round 47. Third round got 55. Well, so total is 159/180 with a X. Fourth among everyone but not up till what i expected. Second round dunno what happen. Only 47. So crappy. Anyway, it is a nice experience. My first shot of the day no good. The string whack my hand and chest because i put very close to body. Damn pain lor.. Then a few shots i draw the string so hard that the tip of arrow was going to drop off that handle. And the string whack my face alot of time. Haha.. Of course i wasnt happy with the score. Haha.. Because shooting is my forte. Sianz~
Then class ended. Walk to mrt station. Ah leow go collect his car at bukit batok, then me and mah take mrt back with some kids. Go home sleep.. Then at night went arcade play time crisis2. To avenge for the lousy shooting with the bow and arrow. Haha.. Almost complete lor. Stage 3 area 3 died. Damn pissed.. I was playing the solo play one. Got one guy who started later then me ended much earlier. Haha.. And when i was resting for the next area, i see his score. Only half of mine when i was at that area. Wahaha... Boo~ Then went play pool and walk around lot 1. Tonight kopi session got more ppl. Brandon, mah, ong, wei jian, jing chi, tsoon liang and me. So that makes 7. If cliff was here there would be 8. Haha.. Saying the obvious. Cliff was with his popular girl aka shiqi. I think he bought presents for her again. WT............ Valentine day - $300++ for roses, $112 for k box then still got pool and dinner. Wow!! Hmm~ He should consider not spending so much on her. Like the girl not = spend lots of money on her. Love not = $$$. Continue. Bought makan then sat at singpost. Then move to mac. Then move to outside mac. Talk alot of things. One table had about three topics going on at the same time. Then everytime will have observer. Haha.. Then talk about jokes about sensitive topics. Then talk about poly and jc things. How poly sucks etc.. Come to think of it. Poly is not as easy as i thought when i was in sec sch. We always think that poly is so carefree not like jc so gan chiong. Only till we get to poly, then we know how poly sucks. The facilites sucks(for my sch), the lecturers(ALL AGREED!!) etc... So the bottomline, JC suffer for two years, poly suffer for three years. Choose. Anyway, i am not motivated in my studies le. Haiz~ just wanna get this nursing diploma and do other stuffs. Sianz~ Things have changed with time. My motive have changed from the time i fill in my JAE form. Then we talk till 1plus. Then went home. Bra drove so he wanted to sent mah and ong home because mah wanted to take something from ong's house. And bra was scared of the dark. Wahaha.. :P Then bra ask me to get into the car. Then i went in lor. My house is only 15-20 min walk from lot 1 and he want to bring me back. Haha.. Nvm la. That was nice of him and the car.
Was quite happy today. Miss snob no longer snob me. But......................... Haiz~
Got this from Chen yie blog where she took from sharmaine blog
If you're afraid to love a person because of friendship, you have two choices, either tells what you feel and let the love take place or hide the feeling under a friendship full of pretensions.
It's hard for two people to love each other when they live in two different worlds...but when these two worlds collide and become one, that's what you call magic!
Love can never be so beautiful without friendship...one leads to another and the process is irreversible...the best of lovers is the greatest of friends!!!
I can't choose who I'm gonna love, but I also can't just love who chooses to love me...and you can't blame me in choosing to love you as much as I can't blame you for not learning to love me. I'm sorry if you can't love me the way you loved the one before me, so I'll let you go to find him/her and hope someday you'll see that the one true love you're looking for was the one who set you free...
How can I say goodbye to someone I never had?Why do tears fall for someone who was never mine?Why is that I miss someone I was never with and I ask why I love someone who's love was never mine?
Isn't it funny we're trying to catch the attention of the one we think we love; we hardly notice the one we're really looking for was just there. You don't notice them 'till they are in the arms of someone else...
Have you really cared for someone more than you expected?Have you ever tried to love him/her despite of all the pain?Will you keep on loving him/her as he/she whispers someone else's name?Will you???
It's better to lose your pride with someone you love rather than lose that someone you love with your useless pride. When you love someone, don't expect that person to love you back the same amount. One of you will be ahead, the other behind. It's either you catch up or the other waits. When you love, you must not accept anything in return, for if you do, you're not loving but Investing. If you love, you must prepare to accept pain, for if you expect happiness, you're not loving but using... True love hears what is not spoken, and understands what is not explained, for love doesn't work in the mouth, nor the mind, but in the heart...
Love is like standing on wet cement, the longer you stay the harder it is to leave...and you can never go without leaving your prints behind...
Don't love a person like a flower, because a flower dies in season. Love them like a river because a river flows forever... Love doesn't have to have a happy Ending, 'cause love doesn't have to end at all.
Never be afraid to fall in love. It may hurt a lot, it may give you aches and pains, but if you don't follow your heart, in the end you will cry even more for not giving love a chance. Love may leave your heart like shattered glass, but keep in mind that there's someone who'll be willing to endure the pain of picking up the pieces so you could be whole again"
The cruelest thing a guy could do to a girl is to let her fall in love when he doesn't intend to catch her fall..
This is the best post i have ever seen in all the blog i visited. It is so real that i cant resist feeling sad. Life is saddening. Till the day i meet you, my life shall be black-white. I want you to smear colour in my life. You are the one. Get it? You are the one!
Ah leow was saying, " How now? Now two person at the same place. What you going to do?" Actually i got the answer, just that i dont want to say. Talk more wrong more. So might as well keep quiet and wait. Waiting is my forte and i HATE it. Life is tiring. *shake head*
Nitez to you~
and so He speaks
Thursday, February 16, 2006
I think i am more uncle like now. I like to drink coffee and tea nowdays. Have it for lunch or breakfast. Old liao lor.. Physically old. Mentally blocked.
Funny thoughts run through my mind today. 1. Is a guy considered a man when he reach 18yrs of age? I doubt so. Because i dont treat myself as one yet. Why must 18 yr old guys be so sensitive about ppl calling them boys instead of men? The guy must have at least went through NS to officially "pronounce" themselves men.
2. Why must human vie for fame, fortune and power? Is there a need for it? Why is there a need for competition? To know who sucks more or who can follow the marking criteria better? I dont see a need to fight for things that one cant hold in his hands. One of my cadets MSN nick, "Since men come to earth empty handed, men should leave the world empty handed". Something like that la. It simply means we should stick to simplicity and not favour for wealth, fame, power. It leads to the destruction of men as witness by the wars that have made an ugly scar to the history of the world. Btw, what is history? What is history when everyday new things are added to it? This is by Ong. History can be what you have done 10 yrs ago, 1 yr ago, or even 1 min ago. History are just info that are written by historian in their point of view. This is by me. interesting huh!
3. Using a broom to chase someone out is considered a bad luck. Even using a broom to sweep things out of the house is considered bad luck. Why? Since using a broom to chase someone is bad luck to that person, why is it that sweeping out of the house is also bad luck? Isnt the logic behind it to get rid of menace in the house by using the broom for both case! What ironic talk it is! What a Chinese tradition! So does it mean that we must sweep all the dirts, cockroach, beetles, lizards, hair from the corridor into the house then it is considered GOOD LUCK? WTF! 4. There is a homesexual incline in everybody's mind. Which simply means there is a gay in every guy and a les in every girl. For homosexual, their incline towards the same sex is much stronger than heterosexual. For heterosexual, it is the reverse. So it is not that person fault if he/she is a homosexual, it is genetically intact in them. Unless you can remove that gene or else why not just STFU and let homosexual to be together. It is already bad enough that they are of a different kind and a deep emotional wound to their parents who brought them up painstakingly to one day know that their child is homo. For guys, sometime in the toilet when using urinal, there will be an unknown instinct to glance to the sides to look at birds. For girls i dunno, maybe admiring or peeping at each other lingerie or crack or cleavage or whatever crap. So dont deny that there is a homo in you. Thought of this while talking about a pair of "boyfriends" in my lecture grp with pihui on the train home. I am hetero anyway.
Still feeling low... When a problem is still on hand, the spirit is low. When the truth is hidden, the search is tiring. Haiz~ Till next time. Assalamualaikum! Pls reply Wa'alaikumsalam.
Nitez to you!
and so He speaks
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Went back sch for lab and tutorial. Left at 5pm. And, sarah was so kind to give me a biscuit she baked herself. Haha.. Thanks for the broken heart biscuit. :P Made my way to west mall to meet my friend. Meet her then go food court sit down. Then we were flipping the JAE book, crossing here, marking there. At last, after around 1 hr, we settle on the course she gonna choose. Then makan, walk around west mall abit then go lot 1. In lot 1, saw alot of familiar faces.Not only single date but also group dates. So envy. Haiz~ Mine wasnt considered a date. i call it a consultation outing. Then walk around lot 1. Saw cliff and his date(s). He and his popular girl and her two friends. But come to think of it. i dont think it is right for her to call two other friends out when it is a valentine date. It make the leads very awkard. After walking around lot 1, send her home first then go back to lot 1 meet cliff and date(s). Anyway, my outing with my friend is just an outing. We have nothing special on. Wahaha.. And, to thank me for my accompanying her do her JAE stuff, she gave me a box of ferrero rocher. Ok. Bottomline. I dont eat chocolate. I only eat snickers or maybe some others in small small proportions. She gave me 16. Wow! I dunno my fridge still can put anot. Haha.. Two years ago, someone gave me three ferrero rocher for dunno what celebration. And the three is still in my freezer untouched. So appealing to everyone, pls ask from me the ferrero rocher if you want because i dont eat it. Dont waste food.
Went back lot 1 played pool with cliff. The girls who dont know how to play sat around and played themselves. Then left me and cliff playing 9ft. Play awhile then decided to make a move. Then their friends wanted to go K box. Actually cliff was planning for K box yesterday night. He already had a reservation. So we went K box lor. I did not enjoy this K box session. Why? Because i dont like to entertain them then they talking or playing themselves. I was singing and singing like almost non stop lor. The girls keep saying dunno how to sing, then from dunno which part of the room i can hear them singing. WTF! Very GY lor!! The popular girl was so quiet. Did not even sing any songs. Sianz~ Then her friends only sang a few songs in the end. And their singing wasnt that great either. So overall, it is not nice. We went back around 1.20am. They took cab home then i walk home.
Never gave any presents to anyone on valentine day. Last year never, this year also never. I think 2001-2003 got give presents to some ppl. Until i came poly, i never give liao. Dunno why also. Either is nobody to give, or i dont dare to give. Last year valentine, was listening to Open Arms. This year valentine, i think i want to listen to Suo Yi. Because something are best left untold. Dunno how you are doing. Hope you are fine. Wish to spend valentine next year with someone worthy. Are you the one?
My second edit now. Went sch at around 10+. Go laserflair rent Kingdom of Heaven for my video review for my Leadership studies. My grp doing on Saladdin or Salahuddin. The movie is about the holy war, Battle of Haittin where Jerusalem was taken over by the Muslims from the hands of the Crusades. The grp booked a small room in the library then started discussing then do the powerpoint. Seems that no one was good at powerpoint, or good at typing. So i have to use the laptop then did all the 20+ pages of typing. And i hate using laptop. The keyboard sucks.. Anyway, do until 6.15pm like that. Left for Lot 1. meeting my parents for dinner to celebrate my mother dinner. We makan at Siam Kitchen. The dinner buffet. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Buffet again.. I think i got buffetphobia now. Suki NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yuki yaki NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sakae NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyway, saw my sec 1,2 classmates cum folk dance partner Marguerite. Not sure if i spell it right. unique name. She is working in Siam Kitchen after her A's. It feel funny and strange to be eating in a place where your friend is working. Saw cihui too eating with her bf. my mother ask me buy a facial wash for her. $30+ Damn exp lor. Can buy dunno how many of mine.
I lost motivation in my life. i am living life by the days. One of my motivators dunno what happen liao. I have lost interest in everything. my brain is not working well. Dont expect too much from me these days. Bottomline. look for a motivator or live life like a nobody. Once a nobody, then a somebody, now a nobody again. Life! Having alot of entertainment these few days. K box, pool, arcade, buffets. A nice life? Nope!! I am using leisure to fill up the 空虚 in my life. Life is fragile. Haiz~
Nitez to you!
ps. You can smell air all around but i cant. Gasping for simplicity!
and so He speaks
Monday, February 13, 2006
Feeling very tired and "sick" of some things. Haiz~ Old age is tearing my body apart. PR problems are making me fatigue. I cant think properly anymore. My mind is blocked. Haiz~ What a life! Sometime trying to know how another person think is hard.
Nitez to you!
and so He speaks
Sunday, February 12, 2006
Went for SJ training today. The sec 1 are in today. Quite little ppl. I think only got 12 person. Sianz~ Every year also kana so little ppl. I dont know what the CCA I/C is thinking lor. A proper contingent is made up of 30 ppl lor. And he only gave us 1/3 of it. WTH! Not that i wanna comment on it, but it is getting overboard. This have been happening for many years liao. We have told him about it but i think he turn a deaf ear on us. Shit lor! You see NCC got so many ppl lor! I think that uniform grp alone can form up the whole NDP in the sch lor. Sianz~ Bribery? Haha.. Or he dont like SJ? Hmm~ For all to ponder. But i still believe that a sec sch student should join a uniform grp if he wants to be a someone in something in the future. Joining those loser sports team bring you no where unless you are at the top of its game. The orientation was meant to be 8-10, but due to miscalculation in someway. It dragged till 11.40. like that. Then my CSM was like gonna cry like that because she did not manage the time properly. To me, there is no need to cry. The first aid lesson from 10-12 can be postpone or shifted to another date. That is no problem with me. Just that they need to stay longer on the next training date only. So i see no point in crying. :P One must learn to be flexible.
So first aid was cancelled on sat. They had some catered makan then the sec 2 and 3 had their hurried lunch then make their way to CDANS for archery. An indoor archery range. I thought we will be outdoor. Haha.. I also attended the lesson. Wanted to know how it is like to use bow and arrow, since in Rakion i am using archer. Starting we have theory lesson, the 4 main type of bows. The parts of a bow and arrow, do and donts etc.. Then the fun part came. The pratical aspect of it was what i am waiting for. Oh! Before that, the instructor taught us how to put on a finger guard. Haha.. He just stick out his middle finger, then put the guard over it. Well~ It is a good way to memorise it but for sch kids .... not so nice la. I find the bow that we are using very lousy. Because the speed of the arrow shoots out is not what i expected. I wanted to hear even louder "swooshing" made by the arrow. Ong also think the arrow slow. Then we concluded that a good bow when being pulled, the pulling hand must be shaking to show that it will have a good power. Overall, it is still fun to play with bow and arrow. Then after archery, went home. The process of going home was not very delightful. Shall not elaborate it here.
At night meet with ong, tsoon,cliff and wj go kopi session. We played some pool but this time we played 9 ft. I still prefer 8 ft. Then we go buy makan. This time we bought alot of stuff man. 5 char kway teow and 5 carrot cake. WOW!! Alot right.. Haha.. Then we made our way to singpost but found that it is quite dirty there so we cross the road to some buildings void deck. Talk and eat. Talk about christianity, girls etc.. The 5 of us dont believe in christianity, so we had a good talk. (Content being censored here!) Waha.. Then around 12 we go mrt station wait for last train to gombak. Train came then we left for home.
Sunday
Wake up quite early, around 8.30am, which is damn early for a poly student la. Did my psycho stuff and i was like gonna die from all those info i have. Sorted it out. I think half of it wasnt that useful. Then after awhile took a nap, dunno why but damn tired. Wake up 1pm like that. Then makan lunch, then flip through the things again. It is a headache flipping though all those info man. Then went to pray around 3pm. Now i get the real meaning of the poem after my mother ask the shi fu. It says that when i start to do something, i dont desire to win. When the things end, i also dont desire to win. Simply meaning i have no ambition in life. Then the last two phrase says that if i start to have an ambition from now onwards, next time i will be a somebody. Hmm~ Quite true la. i think i have wasted my life for quite long. just some history again.
I believe that i am a born sportsman or excel in sports. Just that with my size, my agility decreased. Badminton, volleyball is ok with me. Best at badminton. i remember I versus 5 person at the same time, but still win. Of course la. They are not pros la. But it is something memorable. I remember that my captain ball was ok too. Soccer still all right because is picked up by mself since pri 6. This point i also wanna say very long liao. About soccer. I started really playing soccer when i move to my current house at CCK in pri 6. Somedays i would go down to the multi purpose hall to play soccer with the guys there la. I always kana goalkeeper that time because of speed and skill problem. Even though it was nice playing soccer with them, but sometimes feel weak compared to them. Sometimes they will also blame me for losing etc.. I think i continued playing till sec 2. Because sec 3 dont have so much time to go down to play also and quite scared of playing there too. Dunno why also. Maybe i am not that skilled to play with them at that time. In my sec sch also got play, sometimes after lesson go field play or go mega playground play street soccer. Wasnt that great too la. Just playing around. Then in sec 4 also got play in sch. I think my shooting improve alot in sec 4. I can shoot from the middle of the field and score a goal. And it is a curve shoot. The famous banana shoot. Haha.. So nice right. After i graduated, i think i stopped playing liao. No feel to play too. So actually i pick up my "skill" slowly without any trainers. Hehe.. Now i think i have more power in my shoots but less accuracy. Hmm~ Maybe should play more but dunno play with who also. Moral of the story- You need to live through a period of humiliation and inferiority before you can achieve something. And, if only i have more agility, i would have been a better badminton player. Feel free to challenge me to badminton someday, anybody. i need a good stretch. Anything to do with ambition? Maybe.. :P
Continue. After pray, took 188(what!this bus again) home. What a long journey! Took about 45 min. Then reach home around 5.45pm. Nap again. Haha.. Wake up 7.15 makan then went downstairs do psycho stuff again. Psycho is killing me man. I think i took the wrong approach this time in the project. So tommorrow will be a long day for my grp. We need to settle everything asap as the presentation is on tues. I think chee yan gonna kill me, because i send her part of the presentation late. Haha..
I think one of my friend not very happy with me. She doesnt reply on MSN nowdays. I dunno why la but i think i roughly can guess the reasons. Haiz~ I dont want to lose a nice friend like her. Still waiting for her to tell me the reason. Maybe she doesnt know it, this thing is affecting me very badly. Every now and then i would be thinking about it. Makes me feel so bad. Cant concentrate on doing my things without resolving this situation. Haiz~ So much so for a water person. Hope she understand!
Blogs to recommend. Can go xx and xlx blog to see. XX blog is a no holds barred blog which talks about sensitive topic sometimes which the net police doesnt seem to notice. Then XLX is her/his point of view of current matters in the blog world or the world. And one blog i go everyday, shall not mention here. Private blogs. :PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
Nitez to you!
and so He speaks
Friday, February 10, 2006
Then today went sch at 8am. Wanted to do psycho things also. Sat at mac eat breakfast then write down the points. Then meet with the girls at library. They also finding some more stuff. Then went lesson at 10am. Today elective was good. Only 1 hr. So can leave sch at 3pm. So nice. So early to leave sch. Actually nothing special today. A bored day.
Ok.. Latest update. Last sunday go pray, then the teacher/master wrote the things that I need to take note for this year. To my surprise, he wrote a poem for me using my chinese name in every phrase. But his words illegible, so have a hard time deciphering it. But one sentence i saw was very true. I do not have a fighting spirit. Simple speaking, i dont fight for my rights. That is damn true la. I dont like to fight for alot of stuff. Simple stuff like looking for seats in the mrt, dont bother to tell ppl things which i dont like in their face. Well~ Maybe it is a wake up call for me this time round. Maybe i should fight for my rights in any way. Seeing PK slipping away from my life is a heartbreaking example of not fighting for it. Haiz~ Why must human fight? It is so barbaric. There is no doubt that human is an animal, where animal instinct are overshadowed by laws/rules/regualtions that are hypocritical and unjust in nature. So much for Mankind. What a mileage and development Man have reached!
我在童话里第一次握你的手, 希望我们还有明天! Nice? Derived from 4 song title.. Valentine coming, does it mean that everyone must have a date on that day? Hmm~ Anyway, not gonna celebrate it. Maybe with my classmates so to speak, because lesson tilll 7pm. Or maybe will? Lalala~
I saw in the newpaper recently that there is private sch with a course that is very nice. Diploma in Psychology and Diploma in Counselling Psychology. If only it came out earlier. Haiz~
Very tired these days. Tommorrow training at 8am. Going off liao.
Nitez to you! PK too!
ps. My youth is being eaten away faster than before.
and so He speaks
Then today went sch at 8am. Wanted to do psycho things also. Sat at mac eat breakfast then write down the points. Then meet with the girls at library. They also finding some more stuff. Then went lesson at 10am. Today elective was good. Only 1 hr. So can leave sch at 3pm. So nice. So early to leave sch. Actually nothing special today. A bored day.
Ok.. Latest update. Last sunday go pray, then the teacher/master wrote the things that I need to take note for this year. To my surprise, he wrote a poem for me using my chinese name in every phrase. But his words illegible, so have a hard time deciphering it. But one sentence i saw was very true. I do not have a fighting spirit. Simple speaking, i dont fight for my rights. That is damn true la. I dont like to fight for alot of stuff. Simple stuff like looking for seats in the mrt, dont bother to tell ppl things which i dont like in their face. Well~ Maybe it is a wake up call for me this time round. Maybe i should fight for my rights in any way. Seeing PK slipping away from my life is a heartbreaking example of not fighting for it. Haiz~ Why must human fight? It is so barbaric. There is no doubt that human is an animal, where animal instinct are overshadowed by laws/rules/regualtions that are hypocritical and unjust in nature. So much for Mankind. What a mileage and development Man have reached!
我在童话里第一次握你的手, 希望我们还有明天! Nice? Derived from 4 song title.. Valentine coming, does it mean that everyone must have a date on that day? Hmm~ Anyway, not gonna celebrate it. Maybe with my classmates so to speak, because lesson tilll 7pm. Or maybe will? Lalala~
I saw in the newpaper recently that there is private sch with a course that is very nice. Diploma in Psychology and Diploma in Counselling Psychology. If only it came out earlier. Haiz~
Very tired these days. Tommorrow training at 8am. Going off liao.
Nitez to you! PK too!
ps. My youth is being eaten away faster than before.
and so He speaks
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
After everything, went to suki with jieying, chee yan, sarah at cineleisure. actually suki is better than sakae. Got drinks and can order $1.90-$4.90 food. Sakae only got "free flow" green tea and can only order $1.80 stuff. And the price diff is about $2. So which you think is better? After eating, we go the arcade next door. Play daytona, the house of the dead 2, fireman game, arm wrestling. House of the dead 2 sucks. Not the game but the machine. The gun aiming like shit lor. I aim top it shoots middle. Then the bottom area cannot shoot. Waste money lor. Then the fireman game quite alright. The arm wrestling thing also lousy. I thought i will be using alot of strength, then when it started, i use so little little strength the com lost liao. Waste money also. Then after that we went home. Felt abit sick when i reach home. Maybe becasue of the late nights the previous days. Then took lemsip then sleep.
Tuesday - Woke up feeling sick liao. Sore throat, running nose. Felt miserable the whole day la. I skip the lecture from 5-7, feeling very sick liao. Then when i reach home, my body was feeling hot and cold at the same time. Imagine that feeling. WOW! Slept early too. Last week sick this week also sick. Haiz~ Old liao lor.. Now to talk about what jessica said. I think i told her i not going lecture because i not feeling well. Then she said she dont believe because i dont look sickly. Hmm~ Diff ppl got diff response when they fall sick. Some will turn pale, yet some will still look all right, like in my case. I dont look sickly when i fall sick. So it is hard for ppl to tell that i am not feeling well. I think i dont like to show that i am sickly because it makes you look like a wimp or weakling. And ppl tend to overlook something. When someone is bigger in size, it doesnt mean they will not fall sick. When i was working in KP last time, fanny also discuss about this point with me. For dunno what reason, when a bigger person falls sick, he wont look sick. That is the funny thing. Maybe because a small size person looks more fragile? Looks more sickly? Sg a small country cater to smaller size ppl. Everything is small in nature here. And my mother is kind of noisy, i told her i not going sch the next day. Then she keep asking will the teacher have a black mark on me etc.... Haiz~ Dont like ppl to question me.
Postpone my grp meeting today at 10am to thursday 10am. Because i not going sch today. Rest at home. Woke up with dry cough, running nose. I think will be settling my project works today. Next tuesday got presentation again. Need to complete it soon.
I think i am quite tired of BGR thingy now. Too much bad exp makes you scared of it. Sometimes it is nice to be a single. Thinking about what cliff have said months ago. We were talking about age gap between couples. His point was that age gap was no problem, but both party must be of the same thinking. For example; A 20 and 25 may not be suitable. Whereas a 30 and 35 will be compatible. I believe that he means the level of maturation. The younger party may not see the problems the older party may be facing, and vice versa. Young party may be facing more of studies problems whereas the older party may be searching for his real self, his worth in an organisation. If the young party and old party really wants to get together, the young party needs to be more matured in their thinking and the old party needs to get down to basics and understand what the young is facing. It is kind of like yin and yang, mix well and all will be in balance. More of one will cause upheavel.
I see that some of my friends are facing some problems. Like cliff and his popular girl. He finding ways to ask her out. But she never replys to his request. I cant help him too. I suck at these things. Next is mint. See that she facing some bgr and friends problem la. Never ask her about it. Dunno why i never ask also. Then ong, his regret for life. Cant do anything to help. Jing chi with his everlasting family problem. And i think many more la. Failed as a friend la.
Now i am coughing like siao. Dry somemore. Damn pain. Haiz~ What a life! A dog's life.
Second edit today, the one on top was done in the morning. Now is late at night. Did nothing much in the afternoon. Spend my time coughing the whole day. Ate med then sleep for 3 hrs. That is why i am still awake now. A nap in the afternoon never fails to wake me up in the night. Went dinner at lot 1 with my mother. Then came home, watch some tv, then do my psycho things. I was lying on my bed 10 min ago, turning and tossing around trying to sleep. Then get so frustrated then wake up.
Cliff is asking me to find a date on Valentine next tues. Then i tell him i gonna spend it as a normal day. Then he ask me to get some dates. Then he was asking me to date my juniors, my classmates. Then i was like -_- He always like to ask me ask my juniors/cadets do funny stuff one. Go K-box la, go out play la, go on valentine date la. Hmm~ Let`s put it this way. Sec students is very diff from poly ppl. I dont remember going out during weekdays to watch movie etc.. during my sec sch days. I only remember going to arcade after SJ training and hardly any movies. Only when i graduated then i started going pool, movie, k box. So nobody is gonna touch my cadets in anyway, anywhere, anyhow. :D
I was reading the newspaper yesterday or two days ago. Saw one column on racist things. Well! Let's see. Who does foreign worker means in the papers? Does it mean ppl from Bangladesh or India or Thailand or China or Africa or other places? You see the point. When the mass media dont even state their stand or point clearly, how can the government expect the grassroot level to be? And the horrifying point is, the paper is viewed by thousands or maybe millions of ppl from all walks of life in sg. This is called stereotyping. So there is a need to change how the mass media presents itself to the public. Cant believe the word "foreign worker" can escape the eyes of sharp ppl of the government agencies. Cool man~ Ok. i found the article. In straits time, 2006 Jan 28, news pg 12. "However, the law does allow a person to express a statement of fact that is true or give an opinion or comment provided it is based on facts even if the words are defamatory in nature". So it means that it is all right to make comments on certain topics that is happening but sensitive. Next topic. When a muslim and another person of another religion marry, it is a must for the other party to change his/her religion to islam. Dont anyone feel that it is funny so to speak. Why must it be so special to "force" another person to believe in it? Haha.. Another point to ponder about. The world is strange and full of queer and strange stuff and cultures.
It seems that miss snob is very close with mr shuttle these few days. Haha.. Hope things work out for them. If not, then TOO BAD. I hate snobbish people, so does ong and cliff. And i think alot more ppl hate snobs. So if you are one, you can go scratch your chin. Time to knock off. Long day ahead.
Nitez to you!
and so He speaks
Sunday, February 05, 2006
Looking at CY blog, she have one good friend less now. Haiz~ Again! Well, not for me to comment. Because i do have alot of problems myself with ppl around me. Small kids, big kids, old ppl. I think my life is getting messier by the days. I can see assignments from everywhere piling up. I can see ppl changing and leaving. Sometimes i admire tsoon liang. He is a loner most of the time. I also want to be a loner. No friends, no worries, no work. Walk the streets, passing life as a slacker. How nice it is! I dont care about teamwork. I dont see teamwork. Too many cook spoil the broth. Even the best cook in the world need assistants. So what makes you think a newbie cook can do everything alone. 可笑, 可笑! This world is nothing great at all. I am tired of fighting, alone. Revolution is massive and tiring. Sacrifices are needed. I think i want to sacrifice relationships. History have never recorded any revolution that is small in number and without sacrifices. Imagine yourself standing in a dust-filled barren ground, you standing alone in the middle. In front of you, you have a noob troop who you see as friends. But deep inside no one know what they are thinking. Behind you, where you think you have your allies, are actually back stabbers. All looking at you with blood-shot eyes and ready to pounce on you and tear you into shreds. By the side you see a large cross and tons of nails around it, ready to crucifix you anytime. Who do you trust? Who can you trust? Why should you trust? I will choose to fight on my own. Die a glorious man and not a wimp!
我为人人,人人为我! I believe in this phrase since young. The foundations of this belief have been shaken, ready to unearth itself unless place back by anyone worthy. Are you worthy?
Have i recovered from the December holidays? Or am i lying to myself all this while? :X
and so He speaks
Continue from previous post. Left changi chalet at around 7.45am. Reach home at around 9.45am. Then bathe then went out to meet at woodlands at 11am. Went to jieying house first. play some cards. Lost $13++. Then move to chee yan house. play card again. This time win $6. Then took cab to sarah house. So far lor. At changi or bedok. It is the other end of the island. Went changi previous day, then at changi again that day. Wow! Spend my days at the east of sg. Sarah house quite big. And her kois are so HUGE!!!! I think as thick as my arm lor. That is so BIG!! Then play mahjong at her house. Lose $5 to sarah. She one win all. Haha.. Homeground advantage. Then makan at her house. Then went off around 9++. Took cab with jessica to sembawang, to her relative place. The place was so ulu that we have to stop and see the street directory. The driver also lousy la. Cant read map lor. Wasted so much time. But at least he stop the meter at $18 because we were like wanting to get off liao. That was kind of him la. Then i alight at sembawang mrt. Reach home 11+. Was like damn tired liao. Only three hours sleep then roam whole day. Drop dead after my bath.
Ok. The other days nothing special liao. Except friday go yuki yaki celebrate karen birdday. Then rush to lot 1 watch Fearless with the kopi gang. And before that, i was having elective from 3-5. We watching movie, then yz and ws waiting for me from 4+ liao. Then i told the teacher i need to go off first at around 1710. And he gave me that "Dont lie to me, just get lost" look. Wa lau! I really have dinner lor. Lie to him for what. Sianz~ That is psycho teacher la. He interpret human behaviour different.
Watch I not stupid 2 today. It is a nice show. Touching, funny and very real. The in word for young ppl nowdays "lame". I like the part when that Jerry steal money to buy one hour of his father's time to watch him perform in concert. It is so well written. Jack neo movie always makes me think about alot of things, except that "I do, I do" which is such a meaningless show. Make for the sake of making. This time it made me think about quality time. If $500 can buy one hour of someone time, i will need alot of $$$. Not in the sense of relationship, but to help a person to think in a way that is healthy or acceptable socially. Some ppl are not born with the ability to think positively or even to have a acceptable mindset. As i have said before Quantity not = Quality. What i need is quality time with ppl with quality mindset and quality personality to create miracle or even a legend in the making. I dont like ppl who chicken out when thrown with tasks that are physically or mentally challenging. Hope the people know who they are. Not nice to say the name. The truth hurts, remember? Another way of interpreting quality time- If i have more time to spend with friends, i want it to be quality one. I can spend quantity time with a grp of ppl, but it is not quality. My fault? Their fault? Well. When a problem arise, it is always a two side fault. There is no so called a one way fault. So when someone says it is all your fault, you know that he is a pain in the ass.
The show also talks about complimenting others. It is a very PR thingy. I personally dont like to compliment ppl. If you suck, i dont want to force myself to say that you are good. I will be cheating myself. The world will be a hypocrites world if everyone compliment each others all the time. "Wow! Your dress looks gorgeous" "My god! This is the best performance i have seen in my life" Do you want to live in such a world? Only sissy/noob/shit like to listen to good compliments of themselves. Dont be a pathetic ass who only accept good compliments and push away complaints. If you are one, GET THE HELL OUT OF MY SIGHT! JABROONI!
Saw sh and ct blog, hmm... Ok. Let's put it this way. There is always a high and low period in everybody life. There is nothing called a forever high period. The high period is only a short while, so it is up to the individual to motivate themselves. For me, my high period was NDP 01,SJ camp 01, fac 02 and national camp 02. So in between that time was all low times. It was up to ourselves to motivate ourselves during this time. Even now for me, i am in a low state. Shit are piling on me even without anyone noticing. The strong front always cover the shit that is happening. I receive a comment. I am not efficient. Hmm~ To those who said it, remember what you all have said today. This phrase will HAUNT everyone someday. That is all i can say. Words said cannot be taken back. I am quite tired actually. My eye "shadow" is getting more prominent by the days. Time is short and assignments getting more from everywhere. If everybody is useful, i wont be so tired. Haiz~ Hate weaklings!
Found out that alot of ppl are avoiding me these days. Haiz~ I dont like this kind of attitude. I am sick of it. i dont see a need for this to happen. You have to accept a friend as they are even if they have eccentric thinking, that's the bottomline. Or else you are not worthy to be my friend. I dont like things to turn out so ugly.
Nitez to you.
ps. My life is in a mess now.
and so He speaks
Thursday, February 02, 2006
Saw some of her classmates, see before but dunno name. So just mix around, because i am the extra. Haha.. We play blackjack first, and i cant believe it man. Those classmates dunno how to play. Holy s***! Haha.. First time i see "21" got ppl dont know play. Style man.. Then we go makan. Quite nice. Then we went out walk awhile, went old changi hospital that side look around. So dark sia. We just stand at the hillfoot look up. Then go back. Too dark, no torchlight. Then cut cake. Then everybody left, left only me, yz and miaoling stay. We sit in the living room for dunno how many hours. Waiting for huimin to bathe, see presents. Haha.. What a long wait.. We only started playing at aound 12.30am. Play till 3.30am like that. Then lost $5. Then sit around slack, then go sleep. 4.30am sleep till 7.30am. Need to wake up early because need to rush home, got visiting at 11am at woodlands. Tired now. Continue next entry.
And i have alot of shit piling up. And i am tired. I shall grumble about it next time. For now, that's all.
Nitez to you.
and so He speaks
